Photo's: http://picasaweb.google.com/zmountainman/Bremen?feat=directlink

September 1, 2009

I picked up my new foot orthotics this morning and have been wearing them most of the day. I can feel it in the bottoms of my feet, my legs, my low back and my neck but I think they are helping the peroneous longus muscle which is what they are supposed to do. The rest of it is just my body adjusting to the change in alignment through my body.

I have this weird tingling in the pit of my stomach…I’ve decided to call it excitement instead of anxiety. Surgery in 4 days…

September 3, 2009

Flew to Germany…cried most of the way.

September 4, 2009

Got up early and went to the hospital for pre-op labs. Too early in fact so went back to the hotel for breakfast.

Once we got back over to the hospital (Fachklinik für Orthopädie Stenum) we had to wait a few minutes then Melanie walked us to blood work, then x-ray, then EKG, then an interview with a Resident, then an interview with the anesthesiologist , then finally the important people…the nurses on the floor.

After leaving the hospital we decided to take the train into Bremen (which is actually about 30 minutes away). Getting there was easy (once we figured out how to buy a ticket from the machine which had no instructions in any language other than German…the Germans seem a bit ego-centric in that way, we have traveled all over the world and the vast majority of countries we go to at least put up signs and things in English to assist travelers). We walked around the downtown area, (my new foot orthotics really helped), the cobblestones and old buildings are amazing (RD was wishing he had brought his good camera). RD had a beer or two (I stuck to gin and tonics) and then we attempted to get back to Stenum. Turns out there are 5 trains headed in that direction, 3 express and two locals and there is a split one stop before ours with 3 trains going in one direction and two going the other. We got on the local going the wrong direction, had to get off, wait for the next train, get off at the stop where the trains veered off in different directions and then hop on the right one (lucky for us there was a ticket girl on the train who spoke just enough English to let us know that the train we needed was arriving in 3 minutes so to hurry to the other side of the platform).

We saw two “bachelor” parties in progress. Apparently in Germany they dress the groom up to look like an idiot then give him a box or bag full of stuff to sell (candy, little bottles of alcohol, etc.). He then has to walk up to complete strangers and try to sell his “wares”….I think it’s the equivalent of the “dollar” dance in the States.

September 5, 2009

I was at the hospital at 8:00 for either an 11:00 or 12:00 surgery…I ended up being first so they took me away about 15 minutes later. I only cried a little bit.

I did fine when the anesthesiologist put the IV in the back of my hand…then I was out.

I woke up in ICU with two other people. I was really hot and knew I needed to cool down or it was a sure bet I was going to throw up. I asked for some ice packs about 20 times  (I have witnesses, other Americans who were there with family members who had had the surgery), when after the 20^th time they still were ignoring me I threw a hissy fit and was screaming and crying to the point that they decided to call RD in. Once he was there and told them I wanted some ice packs I got about 4, unfortunately by then it was too late and I “blew chow” all over him and myself. Then there was the problem with the morphine pump. I didn’t have enough strength to push the button (weakness being one of the primary reasons I needed the surgery in the first place). I tried to tell them this as well (same witnesses) but they just kept showing me the button and telling me to push it, like I was too stupid to figure that out. After they cleaned me up and RD pushed the button for me (the one and only time over the course of the night when I was supposed to be pushing it every 10 minutes) I laid there with my eyes closed listening to some yaw-hoo ask for something every two minutes all night long. They all thought I was asleep but I had put myself somewhere very far away (under water scuba-diving) to get away from the pain.

At 5:00 AM they came and wheeled me to my room.

September 6, 2009

At 6:00 I was back in my room. And things went downhill from there…and here I thought I was already at the bottom. Starting with the fact that the back of my hair was dyed orange from the iodine, apparently I had laid marinating in it the entire length of the surgery (2 hours). I took the pain meds they gave me but they made me “obtunded”…doctor speak for stupid and slow moving. By the evening I had a rash that ran from my mid-upper arms to the top of my head, my eyes were swelling shut and my throat was swelling shut. On top of that my headache was so bad I could hear my heart beating in my ears (at first I thought it was someone marching in the room next door…that’s how out of it I was). When I told the nurse she called a little “prick” of a resident (I didn’t originally think he was a prick that just became apparent as the conversation progressed). I explained what the problem was and he asked if I had any “allerghee”, I said no and he proceeded to tell me it was all in my head, that there was no temperature difference between my lower arms and my upper arms despite my chest and face being the color of an over ripe tomato. I then calmly asked him to call my husband at the hotel next door and ask him to come over.

He said: Why would you want to do that?

I said: Does it really matter? He’s my husband… (What I didn’t say was that he has 20 years more experience with pain management than you do and you appear to be clueless…)

He said: Why are you being so aggressive? (He must have read my mind.)

I said: I’m lying flat on my back in a hospital bed, in pain, I am not being aggressive…I couldn’t be more frightened or more vulnerable. (Mind you I am now crying…a real aggressive stance don’t you think?)

He then says: What if we can’t find him? (Can we at least try before we have that conversation?)

I said: Then I want another doctor.

He said: You’re out of luck because I’m the only doctor on call this weekend. (Wel then I’m going to die…)

By this time the nurse had come in and I asked her to please call my husband in room 16 in the hotel next door. RD was there within 10 minutes and assured me that I was not rejecting the implant, that I was not having an allergic reaction to pain meds but I that I was having some kind of reaction to them. He gave me two Lortab and two Clonapin and put me to bed with two ice packs, then took the young resident aside for a little talk.

September 7, 2009

I awoke this AM to find that most of my pain, swelling and redness was gone with the exception of the headache which had settled behind my right eye…a Migraine. Luckily RD had the medication for this as well because it was going to take them several hours to get something for me and I was about out of my mind with pain.

By lunch I was able to eat my first meal.

September 8, 2009

I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle.
  - Robert Benchley

RD fell asleep on the bed with me this evening, it was the first painfree moments I’ve had since surgery.

September 9, 2009

RD has been busy exploring Bremen (and most of Northern Germany apparently since he gets lost almost every time he gets on a train) but today I asked him to please stay with me. All the weird stuff seems to happen when he is not there. Of course it was an utterly boring day.

My gizmo’s:
http://picasaweb.google.com/zmountainman/LisaSCervicalDiscs?authkey=Gv1sRgCNydjsbHkuGvLg&feat=directlink

I think I finally turned a corner at around 2:00 this afternoon, however. I went for a little walk and even met a few of the other patients. By 4:30 I was up and about by myself when RD went to go work out (he was going stir crazy sitting in the hospital) and pick me up some dinner…I’d have to say that on the whole the food in the hospital was not edible.

September 10, 2009

I’m back!!!!! I woke up this morning and my mind was clear. I got up, took a shower, did my exercises (don’t even get me started on that…their definition of physical therapy is pretty primitive) and took a walk, all before he came in at 8:30. Everyone was doing double-takes and asking if I had a twin sister because the change was so dramatic. It was like someone just flipped the light switch on.

When the resident came to check on me he stopped in the doorway, checked the room number again and said I can’t believe you are the same person who was in this room yesterday. We talked for about 10 minutes with the upshot being that they would discharge me to the hotel! I started putting on my make-up immediately! (Before he had a chance to change his mind). I got my first look at the incision…OMG…it looks like they whip-stitched me together with a carpet needle and some hemp! Anyone know any good plastic surgeons who can do a revision?

I went to the nurse’s station to weigh myself and I had lost 2.2 kg! Silver lining to every cloud! In the hallway I ran into Hans (my massage guy) and he stopped dead in his tracks. When you go from a stupor to normal in less than 24 hours people tend to take notice…

The head of the International division came to check on me and boy did he get an earful about that one resident over the weekend but overall they did a great job and I let him know that as well. He plans to “not break the guy” but use the “event” as a learning tool in their next staff meeting.

At 12:30 there was a little birthday get together for one of the other patients. They were all jealous that I was leaving because all along they have been doing fine (one of them was eating a grilled cheese sandwich in the recovery room as I was blowing chow!) and I have been in a stupor in my room. My main problem was pain management, the drugs they used either made me sick, slow or stupid. Once we got that straightened out I was up and roaring to go. I’d have to say there is very little neck pain (which seems odd to me, seems if there are several chunks of metal in your spine you’d feel it), the primary for me has been muscle pain from the distraction (apparently I grew a centimeter from the insertion of the two artificial discs, RD says my neck is noticeably longer) and headaches.

Our taxi arrived at about 1:00 and we were off. Did I mention earlier that the hospital is way out in the country with the cows and the chickens? The Hilton, it turns out, is right next to the Schnoor district which is the oldest part of town. The buildings are amazing and the streets are cobblestone. The bumps along the way did not go by unnoticed but it wasn’t bad. Unfortunately when we got to the hotel they did not have our room ready and I was starting to fold. Fortunately there was a bar in the lobby and since I am off all narcotics I could have a gin & tonic! Silver lining…

Once in the room I had to lay down and take a half hour nap so of course RD went to work out. Then we went for a little walk ending at a restaurant called the Rathskeller…built in 14something…amazing. I tried to order a ½ liter of wine for us to share but that got lost in translation…we ended up with 2 pitchers…good thing we were only two short blocks from the hotel!

September 11, 2009

RD left at 6:00 this morning. I had a really bad night, took a hot bath at 2AM trying to get rid of the muscle spasms, so of course I was very tearful when he left. He scolded me for not taking any pain meds (I hate those things) but they are obviously a necessary evil. I took a lortab and slept for two hours then walked down to Starbucks and contemplated my navel for about an hour and came to the earth shattering conclusion that this surgery messes with the very core of your being (your spine) and it will probably be a while before I find a sense of stability again.

Kathleen arrived with her usual aplomb, she had attracted three men at the airport to help her with her luggage, they got her on a tram and told her where to get off so she didn’t have to take a taxi and on top of that one of them is a world famous artist from Toronto who has a show opening at the Weserburg Museum which is a modern art museum here in Bremen. Unfortunately the show opens on the 18^th, the day we leave, fortunately he and the museum curator invited us to come a day or two before to have a private tour!

We spent the whole day talking, had a great meal (split a bottle of wine) and then were back at the room at 10PM. Boom, we both got our second wind…we were up until 2AM! Of note, sometime between 10pm and 2am I stretched and felt a big “pop” in my neck, after a split second of sheer terror I realized that my neck actually felt better!

September 12, 2009

I have no idea, I completely lost a day...

September 13, 2009

3:30 AM There is a little tiny building in the alley behind the Hilton which has fascinated me since my arrival. I keep going back and touching it’s walls. It’s nothing special, tiny and old in an alley between more modern buildings, not at all awe inspiring as some of the other older larger buildings just down the street. Yet it keeps pulling me back. It was built sometime in the 1400’s, badly damaged during WW II, yet it perseveres. As I lay here tonight I realized it represents me. I admire it’s ability to endure and somehow even thrive despite the odds. I think my body is feeding off the “oldness” of this little city. The cobblestone streets and narrow passageways in the oldest parts of town are comforting in a way that feels like a Grandmother putting a cool washrag on a child’s feverish forehead.

http://picasaweb.google.com/zmountainman/Germany?feat=directlink

RD put in his official resignation today. Yeah! And he sold the car! He will spend the rest of the week selling the stuff we have accumulated over the past two years that we do not want to drag back to the States with us.

September 14, 2009

First thing this morning Kathleen got on the internet and tracked down therapists in Bremen who do CranioSacral Therapy. I wrote down a list of the top 4 “candidates” and begged the front desk to please call and find one who speaks English. Turns out it was the one with the most experience so I was ecstatic. We spoke on the phone and she was just as excited to have an American call her for treatment! She agreed to come to us (I offered to pay more to keep from getting lost on the train again) and she will be treating both Kathleen and me. I am so excited! Also Hans will be coming back at 4:00 tomorrow…bonus!

Kathleen and I did some “retail” therapy today. It’s amazing how hard “work” it has become to try on clothes but the reward of how much better you feel afterwards is so worth it. We only stayed out about 2 hours today realizing we have been pushing it a little hard. After lunch (and a glass of wine) we came up to the room and napped until “Hans”, my personal massage therapist, showed up at 5:00. It really does make a huge difference in how my neck and upper back feels just to have that 30 minute massage.

We then went back into Schnoor for a wonderful dinner. Schnoor is the old section of town with the little narrow cobblestone streets that I love so much.

September 15, 2009

Really…bad…day. Meds are making me sick and I have zero energy.

Meike, the CranioSacral Therapist came at 11:00, and between she and Kathleen, they were able to move the furniture around in the room just enough to make room for a treatment table.

She did a full cranial session on me and boy did that O/A release feel good (the O/A is at the base of the skull). I think that a lot of my headaches were coming from there.

She then spent an hour on Kathleen and found no loss of things to work on there either. I think we both could have used several sessions with her.

After that we took a walk (to Schnoor of course) but my heart wasn’t in it. I guess they can’t all be good days so soon after surgery.

Hans came at 4:00 to give me my half hour shoulder and neck massage, which of course feels wonderful, but I think it was too much bodywork in one day…I know that, why do I get stupid when it comes to myself?

September 16, 2009

Decided to take no meds at all today and did so much better. There is something about these German medications which just do not agree with my system. I also decided to take a course in Washington DC on my way back to Montana. Suzanne Scurlock-Durana and Emilie Conrad co-teach a course every October that combines CST and Continuum work…I’ve taken it once before and I think it will be really good for my neck. Logistically it is going to be a bit complicated because RD will be returning to Montana before me but I will figure it out.

Hans came by at 12:30 for my final massage. When he was done I took a quick shower and we took off in a new direction to have lunch down by the river and then continued on to the Weserburg Museum of Modern Art where the artist that Kathleen met is setting up his show. His name is Norman White (I even found him on Wikipedia!) Check him out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_White

Although I did better today without the meds I of course overdid it and was in no shape to go out to dinner (which of course means a big production of repairing the make-up from the afternoon nap and changing clothes) so we ended up eating dinner here at the hotel. It was excellent, second meal we’ve had here at the hotel and this one was as good as the last, really top notch.

September 17, 2009

OK, the no meds thing was good but when I woke up this AM all the “other” old creaky joints were not happy and my neck was really stiff…maybe a little anti-inflammatory medication won’t kill me.

At 11:00 a taxi picked me and the other two patients up to run us back out to Stenum for our final tests and discharge. As soon as we got there I volunteered to go first even though it was blood draw (which of course I hate) but I figured the faster I got through it the sooner we could get out of there…wrong…we didn’t get back to the hotel until 5 hours later! After they took x-rays to make sure the little gizmo’s were where they were supposed to be there was some kind-of emergency which tied up the doc who had to do our discharge for 2 ½ hours! He had to assist on a discogram, which I thought was diagnostic not treatment so I can’t imagine what the “emergency” was, especially when they finished up with us in a half hour after the “emergency” was resolved…I was about to come unglued!

Once back in Bremen Kathleen and I went on a mad shopping spree; TUMS for my upset stomach…too much naproxyn, socks for my new boots, t-shirts to match a pair of “raisin” colored pants that are impossible to match. Kathleen is a shopping Goddess, she found a t-shirt that matched perfectly and she was clear on the other side of the store. Her eye for color is unbelievable.

I hit the wall so we went back to the room, took a ½ hour nap and then went back to the same restaurant in Schnoor we had gone to the other night. That night we had watched these two men order the sirloin steak for two, it was carved at their table and made both of us drool. We were not disappointed. I swear that steak was as big as my head!

September 18, 2009

Kathleen’s flight was at 6:30 so I didn’t have to worry about a wake-up call. At 7:00 I checked out and shared a cab with Mike and Lisa (Mike had 2 lumbar discs replaced) to the airport. We have little letters that say we need assistance but it was harder for me to make them understand that I just couldn’t pick up my carry-on, it was easy for Mike because he was in a wheelchair so it was obvious. At the ticket counter the lady behind the desk wouldn’t pick up my suitcase (which is carry-on size) because they are not “supposed to” (they must have workman’s comp issues over there as well). She actually, in a very loud German voice, asked if there was someone in the line behind me who would give me a hand. Lisa (of Mike and Lisa), said “Oh for Pete’s sake” and stepped over and helped me. After that she got nice and carried my bag up to the security check point and put it on the table for me, then explained in German that someone would have to lift it off for me on the other side. Once I got to the gate I had to start all over again. The problem with a lot of these European and Middle East airports is that they bus you out to the plane then you have to walk up a flight of stairs to get into the plane. So I needed someone to get me and my “carry-on” down the stairs, into the bus, out of the bus, up the stairs and finally into an overhead compartment (my carry on, not me). Once they figured it out it all went smoothly, the flight attendant even moved me up to business class (for the 1 ½ hour flight from Bremen to Munich) because I was seated in the row right in front of the exit row, which means my seat wouldn’t recline. Once in Munich someone met me at the plane and took me to my next gate. Once again, it took a lot of explaining but they finally figured it out. Not so good when I finally landed in Doha. If it wasn’t for the kindness of an off duty Qatar Airways flight attendant, who literally stayed with me through customs, baggage claim, even scolding me in security when I reached to drag my bag off the machine on the other side, I would have been in big trouble.

RD of course could not meet me at the airport because he sold the car but the taxi stand is close and both of my pieces were small and on wheels. My driver was quite sweet and even brought the bags all the way into the Villa so I didn’t have to get them up the two steps into the house. Which by the way is empty of furniture, piled with boxes, and all tabletops that remain are covered with items for the packing/shipping crew to take care of tomorrow.

My only job was to separate my clothes into 2 piles (those I need for the next 3 months, those I won’t see until January…not as easy as it sounds…the ones I need over the next 3 months have to be able to fit in 3 suitcases, span 3 seasons, travel through Europe, and be appropriate for a 5 day course in DC). After all that, going through my cosmetics and toiletries was a breeze. I hated throwing out so much stuff but you can’t ship anything liquid and it definitely was not going to fit in my suitcases.